Bayern Munich: 'too dominant, regal, relaxed, elegant and cool for the rest'

The word itself had become joke, a brutal eight-letter punchline that knocked down all of Bayern Munich's notorious pomposity, their sense of entitlement and delusions of grandeur. But on Tuesday night, it ceased to be funny. Borussia Dortmund manager Jürgen Klopp reached for it in his impromptu eulogy for the new Bundesliga champions, because there was really no other way to describe their superiority. "They are incredible," said Klopp. "We truly need binoculars to see them. And I can even enjoy watching them at times because they're playing fantastically well."

Binoculars. Fernglas in German. Uli Hoeness, the soon-to-be incarcerated president and architect of this Bayern team, had coined the phrase in May 2007. "We have to make

Lionel Messi hat-trick gives Barcelona victory over Real Madrid

With six minutes to go Lionel Messi struck a penalty high into the top corner of the Real Madrid net to complete a hat-trick and the scoring in an astonishing match that left the title race wide open once again. Just a solitary point now separates these two great rivals. Yet while the biggest game in Spain concluded with a new league leader, it was neither of them. Atlético Madrid are top.
All three contenders stand within a point of each other in a fascinating run-in that concludes with Barcelona-Atlético at the Camp Nou. Madrid's "other team" are top on head-to-head over Real, while Barcelona are a point behind the capital's clubs. The defending may not

Manchester City offer Arsenal's Bacary Sagna three-year deal

Bacary Sagna has been offered a three-year deal by Manchester City and he will consider whether to become the latest Arsenal player to move between the clubs in the summer. The 31-year-old full-back remains locked in contractual stand-off with Arsenal, the club he joined in 2007 and his current terms are set to expire in June, making him a free agent.
Arsène Wenger, the manager, has indicated a readiness to break the club's general policy of granting only one-year extensions to players in their thirties and he is extremely keen for Sagna to stay. The France international has

Full-time: Real Madrid 3-4 Barcelona

It's all over! Barcelona have won!

more later...

Manchester United's Wayne Rooney scores stunner in win over West Ham

Maybe Wayne Rooney will turn out to be Manchester United's Captain Marvel after all. Not many people expected that to be the case last summer, when he seemed certain to join Chelsea, but anything is possible when Rooney is in this form, even goals from 57 yards out. If he ever scores a better goal than his first in United's slick 2-0 win over West Ham United, we may have to stop football altogether, because there would be nothing left to see.
A week that began with faith in David Moyes disappearing at an alarming rate has ended with United looking more like their old selves, the inclusion of

Manchester City's Yaya Touré hits hat-trick in romp over Fulham

No slip-up, no contest and almost no sweat. Manchester City prepared for Tuesday's trip to Old Trafford with an exercise in ruthless efficiency as Yaya Touré led a rout of Fulham with his first hat-trick in English football. Felix Magath was left incensed at a lack of fight from the Premier League's bottom club. On this form, his men look condemned. Manuel Pellegrini's team look in control.
City's biggest league win since November resembled a training session for the final half hour as they prised apart Fulham without performing close to their fluent, commanding best. Their manager withdrew the outstanding Touré, who now has 20 goals for the season, David Silva and Samir Nasri in the closing stages in readiness for the Manchester derby, the first of two testing away games next week that can shape City's attempt to

Luis Suárez hits hat-trick as rampant Liverpool overwhelm Cardiff

The Liverpool bandwagon rolls on. "We're gonna win the league" reverberated from the travelling supporters after a sixth successive Premier League victory maintained Liverpool's pursuit of a first title since 1990 and offered further evidence of their staggering firepower and ability to score almost at will.
Trailing 2-1 at one stage, Liverpool responded in emphatic fashion through a hat-trick from the irrepressible Luis Suárez, who took his tally for the season to 28 in 25 appearances, two goals from Martin Skrtel and another for Daniel Sturridge. Cardiff, who remain second bottom, were powerless to stop the inevitable Liverpool onslaught. Brendan Rodgers's side have racked up 24 goals across those last six league fixtures, an incredible return that

Paolo Maldini: 'All Milan's good work is being destroyed'

The former Milan great Paolo Maldini believes the struggling Serie A giants are destroying the progress made by the club over the last decade following an indifferent season at home and in Europe.
Clarence Seedorf's side are currently 11th in the standings after losing 4-2 at home to Parma on Sunday, leaving them 12 points off fifth spot and qualification for next season's Europa League with just 10 matches to play. Milan were also

Blanc says Paris must hit Chelsea at home

Paris St Germain coach Laurent Blanc said Friday that Chelsea will have a Champions League advantage by hosting the second match in their quarter final.
"We are going to prepare well for this double confrontation, we still have a little time" Blanc said in reaction to the quarter final draw.
"Getting the return leg is a small advantage for Chelsea so we will have to make the difference at home," he told the Paris club's official website.
Paris captain Thiago Silva said

Chelsea hit Arsenal for six to humiliate Arsène Wenger in his 1,000th game

Arsène Wenger's 1,000th game will always be remembered for The Mysterious Case of the Wrong Card, but Arsenal should probably just be grateful the sideshow was so intrusively farcical, and the refereeing so birdbrained, it might spare them even greater scrutiny of their own deficiencies. Ignore, for one moment, Andre Marriner's contribution to a wild and eccentric afternoon. The real story here was of Arsenal capitulating, once again, in one of the major fixtures.
Add this to the 6-3 at Manchester City, the 5-1 at Liverpool, and not forgetting the

UEFA Champions League Quarter Final

QF 4 Manchester United (ENG) Vs Bayern Munich (GER)

QF 3 Paris Saint German (FRA) Vs Chelsea (ENG)

QF 2 Real Madrid (ESP) Vs Borussia Dortmund (GER)

QF 1 Barcelona (ESP) Vs Atletico Madrid (ESP)

Here we go...


Real Madrid recap: An explosive force in this

As Fernando Torres turns 30 is it time he returned to Atlético Madrid?

 In the week of Fernando Torres's birthday, it can't have been much of a present to see Didier Drogba back at Chelsea. The Ivorian's visit with his current club Galatasaray brought with it tributes from José Mourinho, hugs from his former teammates and misty-eyed pre-match reminiscences. All around Stamford Bridge banners still hang that proclaim Drogba as one of the greatest to wear Chelsea blue, and few fans would have begrudged the old warhorse one last goal at the ground. Torres must know that he will never be taken to heart in the same way.
He has always seemed to exist in Drogba's giant shadow. Though he was signed for £50m in January 2011, the sort of fee that

Manchester United's Robin van Persie fears missing World Cup

 

Robin van Persie may not play for Manchester United again this season because of a sprained knee, with the striker concerned his World Cup hopes could be ruined if he returns too early.
Although the club stated that the Dutchman would miss "four to six weeks", it is understood that Van Persie, who had the injury rescanned in Holland on Friday, has been informed of the need for caution. The striker is to undergo treatment on the knee and, even if Van Persie waits the full six weeks, which would take him into early May, he will have to be very careful returning then so as not to compromise playing for Holland at Brazil 2014.
Van Persie suffered

Wolrd Cup 2014 Countdown!!!!

Ronaldo double completes Real Madrid's thrashing of Schalke

 

Real Madrid's young forward Jesé faces a lengthy period on the sidelines after rupturing the cruciate ligament in his right knee in Tuesday's Champions League win over Schalke.
The 21-year-old was knocked to the ground and landed awkwardly when he tangled with the Schalke defender Sead Kolasinac in the second minute of Real's 3-1 second-leg victory at the Bernabéu and had to be replaced by Gareth Bale.
"He has had bad luck

David Moyes bullish amid first hints of Manchester United hierarchy doubt

David Moyes is coming under increasing scrutiny from the Manchester United hierarchy, though the manager insists that his situation remains the same.

When asked about his job security, before Wednesday's Champions League second leg against Olympiakos, Moyes said: "My future has not changed one bit. I have got a great job, I know exactly the direction I want it to go in. It's not been the season we hoped we would have but I have ideas of what I want to do and put in place when the time is right.

"The most important thing now